July
28, 2005
Today I went to Lucas’ school to watch how he acted around his teacher and other students. It broke my heart to watch as he did not interact with his classmates. This was not the first time I have observed Lucas in his school environment. It was just so much harder this time because he is older and at an age where he should have so many friends. Lucas just seemed so sad and out of place as he sat there and did most of his work by himself. During recess a couple of the other kids came up and talked to Lucas, but he just turned away and would not talk back. I could just feel the tears forming in my eyes as I watched my son be so excluded from the world around him. I had to turn my back a few times because I could not stand to watch him.
September 13, 2005
Lucas’ birthday was today. He
turned 13-years-old. We had a party for him here at the house and
invited the entire family. All of the family was hugging him and
telling him happy birthday, but Lucas showed very little emotion toward
all the excitement. Nicholas opened most his brother’s presents as
Lucas just sat beside me and watched. I am upset when I see that Lucas
is not even very sociable around his family. These are the people that
are around him and love him the most. Nicholas gets upset when Lucas
does not acknowledge that he is talking to him. He remains patient most
of the time with Lucas, but he is still young and does understand what
is wrong with his older brother. The speech therapist says that one day
he may be able to feel comfortable around those that he interacts with
on a regular basis. I just wonder when and if this day will ever come.